Had a conversation with S who has done a lot of work comparing Jewishness and Blackness. She was recalling a time when she asked a black theorist what the purpose of a particular black organisation was. She said she was treated with disdain, like she was some dumb white woman (meanwhile a black guy was treated with respect, she said).
I didn't say it but I thought at the time that she has missed the point. It is every person who is from a despised minority's experience that racism and prejudice and misconception exist and you can't tell when it's going to happen or from whose mouth it will come. But you do know that if a person isn't from your group, it's likely to come from them. For me, it can also be frustrating to have encounters where black people assume I am racist and stupidly racist. I get frustrated at those meetings too.
Then I remember that actually, at times, I am a stupid racist - not often and I try to think about it - but actually yes it's true. The allegation sticks.