Had a conversation with N about a dinner party she had been to where a person she met started saying loads of anti-Semitic things, in particular about his boss.... and he knew her mum is Jewish. She said she only just realised why why she'd been in a bad mood for the past three days... It hadn't clicked in her mind.
She said she didn't really confront him at the time, kind of hoping other people at the dinner table would jump in to silence him. I tried to tell her that she had to speak to him about it - that she would feel bad in herself until she did.
It reminded me of how much we internalise. I do it as well. I find it very difficult to react at the time to an anti-Semitic attack. It's shocking and it feels like a body blow so I just don't react.